The title is a bit of a lie, I don’t think lockdown has gotten to me, I know it has.
Lately I’ve become a nag, my temper is short and I feel like I’ve got a hundred and one things to do and that they’re never going to get done. I’m constantly frustrated at the kids, even when they’re not doing anything wrong and I always seem to be snapping at my hubby over the most stupidest of things. It not nice and I don’t like the way I’ve been acting, I try to make a conscious effort not to be this way, but I find myself reaching my breaking point far more than usual and I’m not happy with myself.
The fact is, this lockdown has been worse for me than the previous ones. The weather has been terrible, freezing and wet, which means shorter walks with the kids and no chance of them just going outside to play. Also there’s Covid rules on Wales, where you’re not allowed to drive to anywhere to go for walks, I understand why this has been put in place, but has meant that our walks are more on the limited side at the moment. All of this has caused me and the kids to go a bit stir crazy, as we’re in the house far more than we were with previous lockdowns.
On top of that, I’ve been attempting to do more learning based activities with Frey with very limited success. He is not interested, and its making me feel like a failure as a mother right now. Which I know I’m not (most of the time) but sometimes you just can’t help the way you feel.
I guess what I’m trying to say with this post, is that I’m not okay, but that okay. I know I’m not the only one feeling this way right now. I also know, that before we know it, lockdown will be ending and will be able to get out more. I know that if I keep with it helping Frey learn, he will get there. It’s just a case of patience and possibly chocolate (just to help).